Who does not lead a very busy life these days? Between work and the usual life responsibilities, the parents’ attention is understandably divided and they cannot possibly be able to fairly provide each of their children the same amount of time each one requires – especially when they have five children like us!
Like any other parent out there, we constantly worry about unconsciously neglecting our children and falling in the trap of being too busy to actually enjoy them. We regularly get asked and people always wonder as to how we manage our time amongst the five of them. Here, it is important to know that parenting connections are not about the endless hours of time spent with the child, but how we choose to spend that time which is what truly matters.
Below are some of the practices we do at home, and for the moment our choices seem to work just fine.
- We have a daily ‘connect’ time where my husband and I try our best to provide a ten-minute slot with each of our children. During this time, they have the choice to either play a game, read a book or simply discuss their day and other personal matters. We try to keep our attention focused with as many less distractions as possible.
- Each child is different and typically siblings are quite opposites in personalities, especially twins – I often say. That is why, we carefully consider each of our children’s needs and interests individually.
- We have also created a systematic ritual where we watch a movie together, go for dinner at a nearby restaurant, have an ice-cream or go shopping. This provides additional time for more chats in a carefree environment for both of us.
- On a daily basis, we bombard them with ‘I love you!’ This tells them how important they are to us and boosts their self-esteem.
- We constantly reinforce their positive behavior. By doing so, they know that we are always available for them and we do recognize the effort they are exhibiting daily. Acknowledging these words of appreciation makes them feel cherished. After all, every bit of quality time creates a gigantic positive impact!
- On a weekly basis, we plan and carry out simple yet focused activities together. Baking is one of our favorite. Not to mention constructing puzzles, playing memory games, and dancing together. These actions do not require a lot of effort or preparation, but they do bring so much joy and help us build a strong connection with them.
- We set regular meetings where we discuss along with our children all together what they would like us to enhance and what other activities they would like us to instill in our demanding life. This encourages them to be involved in the decisions we take as a family and shows them that their opinions matter too.
- Finally, we try to mindfully enjoy their presence by embracing the joys and hardships our parenting journey brings forth. After all, we all know very well that soon enough they will embark on their own and lead their own lives!
In conclusion, it is very challenging to be everything to everyone as a parent. Consequently, it is not always possible that parents can entirely be available for each child! However, meaningful and simple connections like the ones mentioned above, leave a lasting impact, fills up our children’s love tank with the affection, reassurance and attention they seek, and make them believe that we have all the time in the world for them!
PS: if you find this article helpful in any possible way, kindly help me spread the word out to other parents.